Past few weeks of mine have gone in solitude. It gave me a lot of time to myself where I was reminiscing some old memories and thats how my Kodaikanal trip came into my mind. This trip was and will be the most memorable and special trip of my life. It was my first ever solo trip! I am fond of travelling. The leisure travelling where I get to relax and unwind myself. But this trip was all not about the place that made it more special, but it was more about the experience I've had.
I always played safe. Hesitated to rake risks and never did anything alone before. Be it shopping, movies, eating at a restaurant or coffee at a cafe`, or travelling. But this always limited my experience and happiness. Because I had to depend on others to do these things. Only if I had some company, would I get to enjoy this.
I got a break of 10 days from work last year April. I wanted to travel somewhere and then visit my family for the remaining few days. I wanted to go to some coastal area like Pondicherry or Goa or Gokarna. I have always been very fond of beaches. The sea and the shores always calms me down. Being raised in a city like Vizag , I've still not had enough of the beaches. And then next I decided to contact my friends if anyone was willing to go with me. Everyone turned it down because it was a very short notice or they were just not interested in going for a random trip suddenly or some reason to not go with me. I was pissed. I was very very angry and disappointed. No, not with my friends. with Myself. I was disappointed with myself. Why? Because there's something I want to do for myself and I have to depend on someone else for this? Why am I doing this to myself? If I want to travel why cant I just go? Alone! I thought about it for a bit and then I gave in. After talking to a friend about doing it solo I don't remember how did I decide on Kodaikanal. I was figuring out everything about the places thats got beaches and in the next half an hour I was booking my tickets for Kodaikanal and then a hotel to be put up in. All in just within half an hour. When I finally finished on figuring out the logistics, it then dawned upon me what did I just do? How will I travel alone? I am a woman, I have to think about my safety. Even if that is taken care of, what will I do there alone? I will be bored. I called up my closest people to understand some tricks and tips for solo travelling. I made notes on a paper and put it in my wallet. I was exhausted with worry and excitement, so I dozed off.
Finally the day came when I had to board the bus to Dundigul and then another bus from there to Kodai. Throughout the bus journey I was anxious and slightly scared. I had no itinerary in place and I did not bother making one because I wanted to go with what comes my way. Uncertainties are beautiful because you have no control over them , you dont anticipate it and you just wait and watch what does it bring your way. And as much as I trusted in the unplanned, this trip turned out to be the most adventurous trip of my life because I hitch-hiked , spoke to random strangers, made friends with people, ate alone in the restaurants , drank tea, coffee and hot chocolate alone at a small tea corner, roamed around and explored the places all by myself, tolerated the lowest temperature, fell in love with the hills and its greenery. I did everything which I was always hesitant to do.
I came back with so many sweet memories with me. This trip helped me understand more about myself. It let me shed my inhibitions and get rid of so many fears. This trip taught me so many things while I interacted with strangers, when I heard so many stories. This trip also taught me not to depend on others for my own happiness. I dont have to depend on people to do things which I want to do. My happiness is in my hands and not in someone else's. My happiness is my responsibility and not someone else's. And I will not chase someone else to achieve this. It also taught me how beautiful can solitude be where you can hear no one but yourself, your higher self. An opportunity that we always miss out on when we are lost in the crowd and all that we are trying to figure out is for a place for us to stand out and survive.
