One lazy Sunday afternoon I was using an old magazine to make some cut pieces out of it and while flipping through the pages I came cross a cover story on many successsful women in industries like film, art, business,sports, corporate etc. Celebrities like Sushmita Sen, Priyanka Chopra, Mira Nair, Saina Nehwal, Anita Desai , Protima Bedi, Chanda Kochar etc were talking about success and how they achieved it. Each of them spoke about success and how fearlessly have they achieved it in their own way. We all look up to to them and somewhere we wish to become like them or close to them. There was something about the article though which bothered me.
'I detest failure. There's no place for it in my life. You only have to think back to the time you were victorious and that helps you overcome the disappointments' - Priyanka Chopra.
I had to pick this one line of all the others is because of how she looked down on failure.
You think these celebrities never failed? They did, all of them. But they wont talk about it, why? Because their image wont allow them to look like a failure to the people in large. They have fans, followers, worshipers or what not. They relate their celebrities to success and fame. But is it really the truth? You speak about success without mentioning about failure and that my friend, is very misleading. The message that you are conveying to the mass is you don't fail, failure is shameful , its not okay to fail, losers fail, you cannot talk about your failures to people because you'll be judged or looked down on or people shall stop respecting you if all you've had is failure.
You think these celebrities never failed? They did, all of them. But they wont talk about it, why? Because their image wont allow them to look like a failure to the people in large. They have fans, followers, worshipers or what not. They relate their celebrities to success and fame. But is it really the truth? You speak about success without mentioning about failure and that my friend, is very misleading. The message that you are conveying to the mass is you don't fail, failure is shameful , its not okay to fail, losers fail, you cannot talk about your failures to people because you'll be judged or looked down on or people shall stop respecting you if all you've had is failure.
Why detest Failure? Why fear Failure? Why hate Failure? The whole existence of success and victory is based upon failure. Even in the English dictionary the word 'F'ailure comes before 'S'uccess. Failure is important and it is normal. It teaches you to be polite, be humble, be thankful and become an amazing human being. Its high time we appreciate our failures. It is because of it that we are who we are, today.
To the parents, please teach your kids about how important failure is. Don't shame them if they are not good with numbers or cannot score 90%. The student who scored 90% looks good because of that student who scored 50%. I mean, imagine a class full of 90%s , who would you appreciate? who would you award? There is no one to compare your credits with. You need a failure to compare someone who succeeded.
To the ambitious and career oriented professionals, stop being harsh on yourself if you are put on improvement plans. I personally know some amazing people (including me) who have been on such plans and God I cant tell you how wonderfully they are doing today.
I knew someone from XLRI, who got rejected by 25 companies during their campus placement. Yeah, hard to imagine an XLRI student failing. The 26th company hired him and he is doing good in his career.
To the oh-so-hopelessly romantic friends of mine, who failed in love so many times that you lost count of it, I hug you tight! You are gifted with power to love again and again. These love failures have gifted you with what others are still struggling to have. Clarity! So, Don't let someone else's honeymoon pictures or date night rendezvous on Facebook spoil your mood. You'll soon need a bigger platform than Facebook, higher and mightier than the Universe, to declare your love because its going to be that huge.
Lisa Kudrow's story of how she landed an opportunity in F.R.I.E.N.D.S is something that touched me deep. But there was something that made me respect her a lot about how she looked at her failures. With respect, with love, with laugh! And she has been the most favorite of all the characters in F.R.I.E.N.D.S .
Oprah Winfrey, looks at failures as redirection ! Redirection to something big, something huge, something that can blow your mind.
But we have always been taught and trained to be disappointed , to be upset, to break down, to be ashamed , when fail. THIS NEEDS TO STOP! Start redirecting them, start telling about the glories which follow Failure, start teaching to accept it and laugh about it. High time, lets sit across tables, lets talk about our failures and do not let anyone judge you for it.
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